


dive into red sun

by spinalvirgin



Series: my red eyes, my white fangs [1]
Category: ENHYPEN (Band)
Genre: Blood Drinking, Canon Compliant, Character Turned Into Vampire, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Vampires, enhypen is a family, every season is vampire season, jay has a few mild existencial crisis, lapslock, pans as weapons, someone wise once said "write what you want to read" so here we are, they dont actually do the nasty, vampire fucker sunghoon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:14:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28205904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinalvirgin/pseuds/spinalvirgin
Summary: jay imagined telling the others about himself and nearly laughed hysterically."hey everyone, remember how our concept is vampires? yeah, funny that, iamour concept. do you have any spare blood you can share?"
Relationships: Park Jongseong | Jay/Park Sunghoon
Series: my red eyes, my white fangs [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2104062
Comments: 43
Kudos: 195





	dive into red sun

**Author's Note:**

> started writing this because i couldn't get jay's fogged up glasses out of my mind, had a breakdown because of finals, enjoy!
> 
> this was actually super easy to write for me, even when i tried to be more descriptive! maybe i just love these boys a lot heheh
> 
>   
> cw for mentions of a panic attack further in the story
> 
> title from enhypen's given taken <3

it's in the little things, jay thinks. 

his sight improved considerably when he was turned, the thick glasses he wore when he was human no longer serve their purpose. but he can't just say he suddenly doesn't need glasses anymore, so he wears them occasionally, even if they do more harm than good. 

his lungs don't work anymore either; it's a conscious effort to inhale and exhale. and so, he forgets he has to breathe. 

"oh, jay-yah!" heeseung smiles, the first to enter their dorm after their schedule. "i thought your glasses would fog up because of the facemask!" 

jay pauses, halfway through the door. "huh?" 

"yeah hyung, you're lucky," sunoo pouts, right behind him. "whenever i wear glasses they just fog up completely." 

_because he breathes_. if jay's heart were still beating it would be fucking racing. 

"ahahah, yeah!" he laughs awkwardly. he lies. "guess i'm lucky!" 

\- 

jay isn't lucky, not in the slightest. not when he has the silver twin bite mark scars on his left shoulder to prove it. not when he can't enjoy a sunny day out like he used to, not truly, not unless he wants a first degree burn if he isn't careful. 

he has many regrets, and going out that one full moon night (it's a little ironic, he thinks, that he ended up a vampire and not a werewolf) is on the top of the list. 

jay doesn't like to think about his immortality, about his friends and family and the people he's found, his _home_ , leaving him behind. about him continuing to live on when they're all gone. 

he is, on top of everything, just eighteen years old, international age. he will forever _be_ eighteen years old. 

a boy. a child, to some people. 

an eighteen years old boy in a new k-pop band, with three years of training under his belt, second place in a survival show, and what feels like the weight of the world on his shoulders. 

a four months old, freshly turned vampire. and he's so, so thirsty. 

\- 

at first, jay didn't really think he changed that much. he still had tan skin and warm brown eyes, he could still go out into the sun despite having to go back inside after a little while, he could still see himself in mirrors. he didn't need an invitation to enter any house and he didn't even miss silver jewelry because steel worked just as fine.

improved eyesight meant he didn't have to wear his glasses, improved hearing meant he could listen to a conversation on the other side of the building's floor with no issues, improved agility meant higher points in performance, non-working organs meant he had to be extra careful at health check-ups.

and then the thirst started. he can't say he didn't see it coming, with how well everything was going. the other shoe had to drop at _some_ point.

it was subtle, in the beginning, an itch in his throat he couldn't scratch. then it was a dry mouth no matter how much water he drank. it began to affect his vocal performance and he dropped down in the ranking, and he _couldn't_ let that happen, so he scavenged for stray animals as much as he could with a heavy heart. his voice was okay again even if the relief animal blood gave him lasted for too little. there was one incident, and it caused the guilt and disgust he felt towards himself to make him nauseous whenever he went out to feed. it greatly overpowered the thirst. he didn't feed for the rest of the time he was in iland.

-

he doesn't sleep, he can't, and even if he could, he still hasn't grown used to hearing as well as he does now, can't tune stuff out. he's tried. 

he's overwhelmed with everything he can see and hear and _smell_ , when he remembers to breathe. he's stressed out because he just can't nail the last step in the choreo and the year-end performances are near. he's so fucking thirsty he can't bear to breathe in a closed off room, the scent of fresh blood overpowering his will. 

it's no surprise when it all comes crashing down.  
  


sunghoon had been eyeing him weird ever since he had found jay, still as a statue, in the darkest possible corner of the dorm, staring at nothing. 

it isn't weird for him not to blink for long periods of time since he already did it as a human, but jay felt like he had truly concerned sunghoon that time, even if sunghoon had just pursed his lips and left the room without a word. he didn't bring it up when they were alone either. 

until... until now, the worst possible moment. 

jay has been trying to ward off a panic attack for the past twenty minutes, but the only way he knew how to was to take deep breaths and talk it out, and he could do neither. he imagined telling the others about himself and nearly laughed hysterically. 

_'hey everyone, remember how our concept is vampires? yeah, funny that, i_ am _our concept. do you have any spare blood you can share?'_

and breathing? that would be putting everyone at risk. he's been trying so damn hard to put his thirst out of his mind but even swallowing saliva feels like swallowing shards of glass, and if he gets a whiff of blood, he doesn't know what sort of monster he would become. 

that's how sunghoon finds him, curled up, crying his eyes out and with snot dripping down his nose but refusing to sniff even in the slightest bit. he feels so weak that he can't hide his face, nevermind get up to find tissues so he can make himself somewhat presentable. 

"jay-yah..." sunghoon whispers. he sounds broken, and like he pities jay. jay can't look at him in the eye. "hey, why are you on the floor—" 

" _please_ leave me alone." his voice cracks. 

sunghoon comes closer, the absolute last thing jay needs. he curls even further into himself.

"no, jay, i can't do that." he pauses, takes a deep breath. "jay, you... you need to drink." 

jay's mind comes to a deafening, screeching halt. 

" _what?_ " 

sunghoon scoffs. "do you really think you were being subtle? do you want me to list off all the evidence i have twilight style?" 

"i just— how— how do you know—" 

"that vampires exist?" he asks. jay, while still sputtering, nods slowly. sunghoon flushes a bright red and jay tries really, really hard not to think about the blood flowing under his skin. "i know someone."

jay frowns. "that doesn't really answer anything, sunghoon-ah."

"i know. i know. just. just trust me this once."

as sunghoon helps him up from the floor, and then goes through the trouble of cleaning up the mess that is jay's face, he stomps down on the wayward thought of _'i trust you with my everything, always'._

sunghoon leads him through the dorm towards the bathroom, shaking his head at everyone that tries to ask what was going on, except for heeseung. he nods at their hyung and heeseung hurriedly walks over to them in an oversized hoodie and pajama pants, the meal that he was eating be damned. jay is somewhat touched by that despite the rising panic he feels because he knows heeseung knows, now. sunghoon squeezes jay's hand in an attempt to comfort him.

they stand for a few tense seconds inside the bathroom that wasn't meant for three people in it, until heeseung sighs heavily, uncrossing his arms. 

"i wasn't gonna push it because it looked like you needed time, but jay-yah, you're hurting yourself." he sounds so earnest. "how long has it been?"

jay clenches the hand that isn't held by sunghoon to a fist and refuses to meet their eyes. "four months."

heeseung and sunghoon's gasps resonate in the tiny bathroom. heeseung immediately steps up to jay and touches his face like he's trying to check for his temperature, which is useless, since jay runs permanently colder than your average human now.

"a-and you haven't drunk? _at all?"_

jay bites his lip, ashamed. he did drink but he was only buying himself time, and he hasn't drunk anything in almost two months, so he settles for a simple, tiny sounding, "no. not from a human."

heeseung and sunghoon just stare at him in what looks like awe for a few beats.

"do you have any idea how hard it is for new vampires to control themselves, jay-yah?" sunghoon asks slowly. jay thought he did. he shakes his head. "if it were anyone else, i don't know if we'd be alive by now."

jay's face crumbles and with his guard down, he allows himself to sniffle. his eyelids flutter when the combined scents of the humans before him reach his brain. he can feel his eyes changing to a deep, cold crimson. he takes deep breaths, he can't get enough, his mouth waters. their scents spike with their new fear, backing up further into the bathroom. jay outright _growls_ ** _._ **

the door opens suddenly. he turns around with a snarl, lunges at the new human (jungwon, his non-feral mind supplies) in his rabid frenzy, and his face meets a steel pan for his efforts with a loud, echoing _twoonk_.

before he passes out, he hears a smug, "i _told_ you you'd need me."

-

there was one night, the night jay snuck out to drink for the last time (or the incident, as he's been calling it) where he saw his reflection in the bathroom mirrors of the iland dorms and it shook him to his core.

it was way past midnight and everyone else was sleeping or too wrapped up in the games they weren't really allowed to play. jay climbed through his bedroom window swiftly, without any noise, and zoomed towards the bathroom to clean himself up. no matter how much he tried, he was a messy eater and blood ended up all over him to the point he had to have a change of clothes ready when he came back; the clothes he'd worn becoming useless.

he tried to avoid his reflection too, back facing the mirror, but a voice in his head was screaming at him to turn around and _see_ what he'd become.

he didn't recognize himself for a second. there was blood drying on the corners of his mouth and all the way down to his collarbones, some of it even clumping strands of hair together. his t-shirt was ruined, of course, with the entire chest painted a deep red.

his _eyes_ , though. he can't describe them even today as anything but _hungry_ , his pupils dilated to the point his eyes were almost entirely black, only a thin, glowing ring of red visible in his irises. he pulled the corners of his mouth to reveal sharp, sharp canines still stained red.

he looked like something out of a horror movie. he _is_ something out of a horror movie, and he's still so scared of himself.

-

jay wakes up almost half an hour later with a groan and a massive headache. that might be the thirst though, and not because he got well acquainted with their kitchenware. he swipes his eyes over the room and glares at jungwon, sitting on the bunk bed in front of jay's, even when he knows he deserved that one. jungwon unabashedly grins at him. what he assumes is the vampire side of his brain yells at him to hiss at jungwon, which is actually a very concerning discovery.

he represses the urge to sigh _very_ hard.

"and how did _you_ find out?"

jungwon scrunches up his nose. "jay-hyung, i'm the leader. i'm supposed to know about these things."

"about one of your members turning into a bloodthirsty monster?" jay half-jokes.

"about one of my members dealing with stuff that he shouldn't be dealing with on his own," he answers, leaning back on the bed and crossing his arms. jay wishes jungwon didn't have to carry the weight of being a leader at just sixteen years old. jay wishes for a lot of things.

he groans and roughly rubs his hands over his face.

"fine. _fine._ but i have a lot of questions."

"everything in due time, hyung," jungwon says cryptically. jay feels like telling the managers to take his phone away at night if he keeps that up.

-

the meeting they have set up with all the members feels like an intervention, or an overly made up family dinner. the way sunoo taps his plastic wine glass with a fork to catch everyone's attention doesn't help.

"we've all gathered here today," sunoo starts. there is more than one groan in the table. sunoo glares at everyone. "to tell jay-hyung how dumb he has been."

"yah!" jay croaks.

"please, jay, he's right. we've all seen you struggle when you could've easily come to us," jake tells him, staring right into jay's eyes, almost pleading him to trust them. "and, we all know."

before jay has time to open his mouth, jungwon intervenes. "sunghoon-hyung told heeseung-hyung, they told me, and i told everyone else."

"if someone didn't believe it all they had to do was watch you for like, two seconds, hyung," sunoo says with his face resting on both of his hands. " _are_ you trying to hide it?"

sunghoon stares at sunoo for long enough that sunoo cringes and turns his body back towards the table. heeseung gently puts one of his hands on jay's shoulder before he can do something stupid, like snarl.

"remember that one time when i pointed out how your glasses didn't fog up?" heeseung asks softly. he can be a real pain in the ass sometimes, but he's truly the best hyung jay could ask for. he nods. "we've known since before then. it was a reminder for you to breathe without stepping over the wall you created for yourself."

"yes, hyung, we kept noticing how still you went when you didn't remember to act human," niki adds, eyes big.

"clearly, the wall has to go." sunghoon raises his eyebrows pointedly.

jay glances at everyone in the room in awe. after everything he's been berating himself for and all the guilt he's been carrying, they're here for him. and, he thinks, they always will be.

"y-you're all okay with this? with me?"

jay's bottom lip trembles dangerously when all he receives are blinding smiles and encouraging nods, and even a mumbled _'it's not even the most surprising thing that's happened this year'_ from sunoo. jungwon rushes to pinch jay's nose before he can sniffle and get himself into another blood frenzy.

" _nononono_ ," he chides. " _no_ breathing until we sort your thirst out."

"oh, yes, we would _hate_ to hit you with a pan again," heeseung smirks.

jay sighs contently, in his head. it'll be alright.

-

it's not alright.

when they realized they couldn't possibly steal blood bags from hospitals (niki sulked for the rest of the day, and jay doesn't feel like unpacking all of _that_ ), they decided that the only option they had was for jay to drink from them, and even that took a lot of convincing. jay just didn't want to hurt them, but six united voices telling him they didn't want a ticking time bomb in their dorm plus jake's careful _'jay-yah, we'll make sure you won't hurt us'_ made for a compelling argument.

sunghoon would be the first that jay would drink from, after he said he knew what being bitten felt like. (jay is getting to the bottom of that, someday). they'd discussed what sorts of effects the bite had on both human and vampire alike and knew the consequences of the venom high, so any lingering arousal from it was accounted for and wouldn't be a problem. they wouldn't let it become awkward, at least. 

now, though, sunghoon looks like a painting, like something out of a dream. he's lying on the living room couch over some towels, breathing a bit heavily, naked from the waist up and flushed all the way down to his chest. his black hair is spread around him like a dark, dark halo. he has an arm extended towards jay on the other side of the room; offering himself up, his vampire lizard brain supplies.

jay wants to inhale only because he craves to know exactly what sunghoon smells like right now. he tilts his head to the side, deep in thought. would he smell acrid, afraid? or… jay glances at sunghoon's half lidded eyes. or is he _excited_ , waiting, scent so sweet it would cloud jay's mind, his fangs threatening to split his bottom lip in three? he's staring so intensely he sees the slight tremors going up and down sunghoon's body.

"you're shaking," jay blurts out, his voice tinged with a growl. the shudder that goes through sunghoon is more noticeable this time.

"you _are_ kind of a predator and you _are_ about to drink from me, jay-yah. excuse me if i'm slightly scared."

jay glances at sunghoon's almost glowing blush. he steps closer, oh so slowly, until he's towering over sunghoon, his blonde hair forming a curtain over his eyes. he doesn't know what's coming over him, but he feels calm, slightly drunk on the effect he seems to have over the human. he traces from sunghoon's face all the way down to the offered wrist with elongated nails and watches him shiver.

"i don't think that's it, though," jay smirks in sunghoon's ear. "i think you're enjoying this."

sunghoon tries to wiggle away from him, but it only causes jay to grip his neck and wrist tightly, a warning hiss on his lips. sunghoon whimpers when jay moves and licks a little stripe up his wrist, _tasting_ the blood under his skin.

"you have no idea how much i want to breathe you in," jay whispers, shaking now, too.

there's a challenge in sunghoon's eyes when jay looks at him, as if saying _'then do it',_ but he can't allow himself that, not unless they want to clean up more than just a few drops of blood off their couch. jay shakes his head frantically, abruptly sobering up from his predatory daze, and sunghoon's gaze softens.

"jay-yah, _jongsung-ah_ , it's okay," he whispers, caressing jay's cheek softly. "i know what i'm doing. i'll guide you."

jay nods, still shaking. he softens the grip he had on sunghoon's neck and moves to kneel on the floor. both his hands grip sunghoon's wrist gently. if he focuses, he can hear sunghoon's rapid heartbeat. his mouth waters.

"let me see you," sunghoon pleads.

jay looks up and lets red bleed into his irises, lets his fangs grow long. they ache a little, after not using them for a while. sunghoon smiles softly, his free hand going from jay's cheek to his hair.

"your pupils are slitted," he laughs, petting jay. "like a cat's."

the predator side of his brain completely shuts down and all he wants to do is purr. he feels warm, safe. he nuzzles into sunghoon's hand. _it's okay_. sunghoon will take care of both of them.

"i have my hand on your hair, jongsungie. if something happens, i will pull on it, and you will let go. that clear?"

jay nods, they had talked about that. he will try his damnedest not to lose himself anyway. they look into each other's eyes for a last confirmation, and they see that _yes,_ they're both sure of this. jay bites down as gently as he can on sunghoon's wrist as the human tightens his hold on jay's hair.

it's… _oh_. it's incredible.

jay whimpers when the rich taste floods his mouth and he bites down harder to get more of it, but the grip on his hair tightens as a warning and deep in his mind, he knows he has to pull away. he retracts his fangs and starts sucking, licking, _savouring_. it's the best thing he's tasted in his _life_. it tastes metallic, of course, and tangy, but there are sweet, sweet notes to it that are making jay moan as he swallows it down. it tastes like life itself.

sunghoon pulls on his hair once more and he licks the wound one last time so it fully closes, leaving no scars behind. healing saliva, his blood-drunk mind offers. when he glances up, he sees that sunghoon's eyes have glazed over and his breathing is all over the place.

before he knows it, he has straddled sunghoon's lap and has a hand on the human's neck. he can't stop looking at sunghoon's parted lips, sunghoon hasn't once looked away from his mouth.

"can i pl—"

" _do it,_ " sunghoon snarls.

their mouths clash.

while jay has now both of his hands gripping sunghoon's face, pulling him closer, trying desperately to taste more of him; sunghoon circles his arms around jay's neck and buries his hands in the vampire's hair. their tongues tangle together and he sucks on jay's tongue, tasting the remaining blood on it. 

jay can't say that he has a lot of experience with all of this, so when they part to allow sunghoon to breathe, he is shivering with want.

"what _are_ you," he whispers. sunghoon blushes even brighter.

"i have no idea what i'm doing," he confesses. "i just thought that would be hot."

jay frowns, forehead touching sunghoon's. he feels warm all over, he can't resist; he moves one of his hands to delicately touch over sunghoon's bare chest. his breath hitches.

"but you said you had experience—"

"i said i knew someone. i have an ex," he clears his throat. "just him."

despite how curious jay still is, there are more pressing matters at hand, and they make themselves known when jay shifts himself on sunghoon's lap and their half-hard cocks rub together. they hiss in unison.

jay feels himself blush, and _that_ hasn't happened in months. his eyes widen. does that mean—

he inhales carefully and stares into sunghoon's eyes in shock when he isn't consumed by feral thirst, and is instead welcomed by a sweet, warm, but slightly metallic scent. sunghoon smiles up at him and caresses his cheek. he wants to cry, because… he's no longer a danger to everyone in the dorm, or himself. he buries his head in sunghoon's shoulder and the human rubs his back softly as sobs wreck jay's body, until his shaking goes down.

"i… hope you're not crying because we crossed several lines just now," sunghoon jokes after a few quiet beats. jay huffs out a laugh and straightens himself up before grabbing one corner of the surprisingly blood-free towel (kudos to sunghoon's guidance, really) and patting his face dry.

"not at all, sunghoonie," jay smiles once he's done, honest. "i'm truly, truly thankful we did."

then, jay grinds his hips down with intent where he's seated on sunghoon's lap.

"wanna cross some more?" he asks lewdly, running a hand through his hair and winking.

sunghoon laughs brightly, throws jay off his lap and on the couch, and reconnects their mouths.

-

sunoo whines behind the door, armed with a steel pan just like heeseung. they were the contingency plan. heeseung thinks they aren't needed anymore.

"are they gonna go on for longer, hyung?" sunoo asks. "i need to go pee."

heeseung huffs out a laugh, shaking his head.

"i think they will still be a while in there."

sunoo groans and turns to bang on the living room door. he's doing a poor job of hiding his concern under annoyance, heeseung thinks, but judging by the sort of noises that filter out of the room, sunghoon and jay are doing just fine. heeseung is sorry they're being subjected to this, though, even if they knew it was a possibility.

as if remembering they had a pseudo audience, the noises stop. heeseung can feel the mortification all the way through the closed door.

"h-heeseung-hyung, sunoo-yah! it's fine! you can leave!" jay shouts, sounding panicked. sunoo bangs on the door some more, just to be a little shit.

"yah, vampire-hyung, vampire fucker-hyung! finish up already, we have that— _thing_ scheduled tomorrow morning!"

"fuck _off,_ sunoo!" sunghoon screeches.

heeseung bursts out laughing at sunoo's face going from shocked to offended, already imagining jungwon's long suffering sigh in his head.

they will be okay. they will all be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> please leave kudos and comments if you so desire ;D happy holidays everyone!!
> 
> find me on twitter! [sfw](https://twitter.com/sanlicylicacid), [nsfw (18+)](https://twitter.com/sanstrokegame)


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